Listing and choosing: と, や, とか, か, たり

Japanese has several words for "and", and they are not interchangeable. The main question: is the list complete or just examples?

と joins nouns in a closed list: exactly these, no more.

と joins nouns only, never verbs or sentences. For those you use other tools (て-form, 〜し, 〜たり).

や joins nouns as examples: "A and B and similar things".

とか is the casual version, and it can also join verbs and clauses:

など ("etcetera") goes after the last item:

You may combine: AやBなど. For three or more items, 〜や〜や〜など.

A casual way to pile things up, mostly in speech and food menus:

か between nouns means "or":

For choices in a question, use それとも:

A か B か: used for "whether A or B":

も〜も means "both ... and" in a positive sentence and "neither ... nor" in a negative one.

For verbs, use the たり form: the past form plus り (食べた → 食べたり). Two or more actions, as examples of what you do, followed by する.

It also works with opposites to show repetition or alternation:

Notice the structure: each verb is in the past form plus り, and する comes last, carrying the tense. The sentence lists examples, not everything you do.

たり also works with adjectives and だ:

Lists in real writing mix complete lists, example lists and alternatives. Identify which is which.

• と = complete list of nouns. や / とか / など = examples.
• か = or. それとも = or (in a question).
• も〜も = both (positive) / neither (negative).
• 〜たり〜たり + する lists example actions.